Old people have the best names

Death notices today: Ces Nosworthy, Carlyle Buntine and Aubrey (known as "Aub") Mattner. Happily, not all old people with great names are dying just yet. Today I also had to read an item about a couple of local Red Cross groups, which held a joint meeting to celebrate fifty years of good works by a lady called Melba Plush. I like that so much, I may actually change my name.

The fact that the Red Cross groups were from Nareeb Nareeb and Brit Brit (both of which are near Drik Drik) made it even more special.

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Conversation snippet #1

Man in suit on mobile phone, standing outside court: "Did she say that? She's a moll. (pause) I'm not saying she's a moll because she's a lesbian, I'm saying she's a moll because she's a frigging MOLL!"

Charming.

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I should have said last week: I'm having mushrooms for dinner! Out of the box in the laundry, of course. They're not as nice as fresh field mushrooms, but they're still pretty tasty.

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Conversation snippet #2
My mother: Did I tell you Sue Lewis bought a new sewing machine?
Me: No, you didn't.
My mother: Well... Sue Lewis bought a new sewing machine.
Me: Really? I hadn't heard.
My mother: Don't laugh at your mother.

The scary thing is that I have heard her have that exact conversation with my grandmother, only playing the other role. Brrrr.