![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Five blade fusion
Aug. 13th, 2008 12:18 pmI had a phone call the other day. It was John, currently on holiday with my mother in the wilds of Western Australia. Even when he's at home, John doesn't normally ring me for a chat; on holiday, he and my mother have a strictly enforced "no news" policy, which results in some hilarious gaps in their current affairs knowledge appearing six months down the track: "What do you mean, the new pope?" So when I heard his voice, I was worried that something had happened to my mother. Happily, no.
"I don't want your mum to hear, so I'm calling while she's in the shower," he whispered. "We had the radio on in the car yesterday and I realised that the Olympics are on. Could you tape the archery for me?" Sure thing. "And when you give me the tape, could you pretend it was your idea? I'm going to pretend I'm disappointed I forgot about it."
Well, his performance as Man Disappointed He Missed The Olympic Archery must have been Oscar-worthy, because my mother rang a few hours later. "Are you watching the Olympics? If you see any archery, could you tape it for John? He's so disappointed he missed it." she whispered. "Pretend it was your idea."
Actually, I hadn't been watching much of the Olympics (Australian coverage is All About The Swimming at this stage, and I'm really not into the patriotic cheering that goes on in the commentary booth), but I've made an effort since then to be on the lookout for archery. The supplementary broadcaster is showing uninterrupted coverage of three of the gold medal archery shoots and I've set the tape for them, so that should keep John happy. I watched the first one; the archery commentator had the most marvellously booming theatrical voice. I kept expecting him to burst into excerpts from King Lear in between telling us how brilliantly the Korean team was doing.
Last night while on Archery Watch, I saw some of the equestrian event. I'm always amused by commentators who tell us what the athletes are thinking ("He really wants to win this") but the equestrian commentator was also telling us what the horses were thinking ("She's trying her hardest for the rider. Good girl, little horse!"). So that's quite a special ability he's got there. Also, is there any sport more pointless than water polo? No; no, there is not.
I also saw an ad for the Schick Quattro, a razor that has four blades. I was idly musing about how amused I was back when razors first got two blades and now they're up to four, when another ad came on for the Gillette Fusion, which has five blades, and I nearly choked on my raspberry and peach tea.
"I don't want your mum to hear, so I'm calling while she's in the shower," he whispered. "We had the radio on in the car yesterday and I realised that the Olympics are on. Could you tape the archery for me?" Sure thing. "And when you give me the tape, could you pretend it was your idea? I'm going to pretend I'm disappointed I forgot about it."
Well, his performance as Man Disappointed He Missed The Olympic Archery must have been Oscar-worthy, because my mother rang a few hours later. "Are you watching the Olympics? If you see any archery, could you tape it for John? He's so disappointed he missed it." she whispered. "Pretend it was your idea."
Actually, I hadn't been watching much of the Olympics (Australian coverage is All About The Swimming at this stage, and I'm really not into the patriotic cheering that goes on in the commentary booth), but I've made an effort since then to be on the lookout for archery. The supplementary broadcaster is showing uninterrupted coverage of three of the gold medal archery shoots and I've set the tape for them, so that should keep John happy. I watched the first one; the archery commentator had the most marvellously booming theatrical voice. I kept expecting him to burst into excerpts from King Lear in between telling us how brilliantly the Korean team was doing.
Last night while on Archery Watch, I saw some of the equestrian event. I'm always amused by commentators who tell us what the athletes are thinking ("He really wants to win this") but the equestrian commentator was also telling us what the horses were thinking ("She's trying her hardest for the rider. Good girl, little horse!"). So that's quite a special ability he's got there. Also, is there any sport more pointless than water polo? No; no, there is not.
I also saw an ad for the Schick Quattro, a razor that has four blades. I was idly musing about how amused I was back when razors first got two blades and now they're up to four, when another ad came on for the Gillette Fusion, which has five blades, and I nearly choked on my raspberry and peach tea.