The Secret of the Glen

This cat knows exactly how stupid it looks. I like that customers who bought that also bought a book called How to Tell If Your Cat Is Trying To Kill You. Making it wear one of those things would be the first clue.

Also, dogs.

A conversation with my mother:

My mother: John needs some new t-shirts, just cheap ones to wear in the garden, but I couldn't find any plain ones in Target. They all had American names on them. Phoenix, Cleveland, Bay City Rollers.
Me, after a pause in which I tried to make sense of that: Green Bay Packers?
My mother, waving her hand airily: It's all the same thing.

A conversation overheard while buying shampoo:

Old lady shopper: I saw it on TV, this shampoo, it was called Clean, but I can't see it here.
Young shop assistant: I don't think we stock that, but I'll have a look for you.
Old lady shopper: It was on TV. I thought that sounds good, I have allergies.
Young shop assistant: So it was a special sort of shampoo for sensitive skin?
Old lady shopper: Yes. It was for hair.
Young shop assistant But was it a shampoo for...
Old lady shopper, kindly: Hair.

Coincidentally, the shampoo I bought was also for hair.