Fert on our dirt

[todayiamadaisy]

For many years the people at Hi Fert (a crop fertiliser company) inflicted a terrible ad on radio listeners, exhorting them to 'give the Hi Fert boys a go'. I realise that doesn't look so bad on the page; the true horror of it lay within the numerous repetitions of the slogan by a flat, droning voice. Imagine a man being really depressed that he's had to take a job advertising fertiliser and investing his performance with a complete lack of feeling, and you'll get the picture.

I heard Hi Fert's new ad today, and it's no better. In fact, I'd go so far as to say it's worse. They've discovered rhyming. It's still the same voice, now droning a badly-scanned poem urging us to put some Hi Fert fert on our dirt for a growth spurt. There was more but I couldn't take it in.