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My mother and a couple of her friends have gone a quilt crawl today, meaning they are driving round the countryside going to quilt shops in small towns, stopping for lunch at the Timboon Distillery and afternoon tea at Cheeseworld. They know how to live. That's not really pertinent to this tale, though. What is pertinent is that when my mother's friend Sue came to pick her up, she walked in with a small parcel. "I feel like Santa," she said, "delivering presents the postman left at your front door." She handed the parcel to me.

I'm not expecting any parcels. What could it be? I opened the plastic envelope and found a box:

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Fancy Feast his His Lordship's preferred brand of tinned food. Earlier this year, they had a promotion in which you could send in proof of purchasing so many tins of it and they would send a prize. I ended up with the decorative food bowl I originally wanted, plus a fancy collar and a second bowl in the distribution of unclaimed prizes. So what's this? Another bowl? Well, no.

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Does that look like... a tin of cat food, beautifully packaged? Yes. Yes, it does. It's a tin of Tuna Florentine with a Delicate Sauce as their special gift to me (or Alistair, rather). How thoughtful.

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