Dinner with my mother and her partner John. "John's made a thing," announced my mother proudly (and bafflingly).
"What sort of thing?"
"Well," said John, "there's been some crows coming and eating the corn out of the vegie patch, so I made a Crow Scaring Machine."
"A scarecrow."
Pause. "Oh. Yes."
Heh. "But it's a machine, you said? Not just a man on a stick, then?"
"No. There's this one bit of fence where they like to perch, so I put a wooden ruler on it. So they land and under the wooden ruler is a little electronic circuit, so when they land they trigger the circuit and that triggers a rat trap - no, don't look like that, it's in a box under the fence, it's not to catch them. So they set off the rat trap, which makes a noise, and it's also connected to a circuit so that when it goes off it also sets off two party poppers into the air, you know, streamers and a big bang. And that scares the crows."
"Does it work?"
"Well, it's been set off twice, but I've not seen it. We've come home and there's been streamers in the garden."
"And I don't think we've seen the crows quite as often," added my mother. "But we really want to see it go off."
"You need another circuit with a camera on it, like a traffic camera," I suggested, more as a joke than a serious suggestion.
"That's a good idea! One of those disposable ones. I'll give it some consideration," said John.
And it occurred to me that retired people have way too much free time.
Also, by popular demand (well, one demand), ( the bracelet I bought at the antique fair: )
"What sort of thing?"
"Well," said John, "there's been some crows coming and eating the corn out of the vegie patch, so I made a Crow Scaring Machine."
"A scarecrow."
Pause. "Oh. Yes."
Heh. "But it's a machine, you said? Not just a man on a stick, then?"
"No. There's this one bit of fence where they like to perch, so I put a wooden ruler on it. So they land and under the wooden ruler is a little electronic circuit, so when they land they trigger the circuit and that triggers a rat trap - no, don't look like that, it's in a box under the fence, it's not to catch them. So they set off the rat trap, which makes a noise, and it's also connected to a circuit so that when it goes off it also sets off two party poppers into the air, you know, streamers and a big bang. And that scares the crows."
"Does it work?"
"Well, it's been set off twice, but I've not seen it. We've come home and there's been streamers in the garden."
"And I don't think we've seen the crows quite as often," added my mother. "But we really want to see it go off."
"You need another circuit with a camera on it, like a traffic camera," I suggested, more as a joke than a serious suggestion.
"That's a good idea! One of those disposable ones. I'll give it some consideration," said John.
And it occurred to me that retired people have way too much free time.
Also, by popular demand (well, one demand), ( the bracelet I bought at the antique fair: )