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There was a baby in today's paper named Daisy Alicia. I don't know the parents, but, clearly, they've named her after me.

In the newsagent today, I was picking up the daily paper when a woman came in and looked at the display of Christmas decorations nearby. I don't know what she did differently to everyone else who had passed by, but somehow she set off the Santa Claus figurine. 'HO HO HO,' he bellowed, startling everyone within earshot. The woman waved ineffectively at him. 'No, stop,' she said, but that didn't work. He kept bellowing and she fled to the greeting card section so no-one would know it was her.

Mere seconds later, another noise, this time from the direction of the greeting card section. This time a Santa Claus voice was singing, 'DON'T YOU WISH YOUR GRANDPA WAS HOT LIKE ME?' and when I looked up, I saw the woman quickly closing a card, putting it down and walking away. She's going to have nightmares about Santa Claus this Christmas.

Taipan!

Jul. 9th, 2009 06:29 pm
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Strolling through the shopping centre to get to the supermarket today, I passed a couple of school holiday activities. In one empty shop a group of Tibetan monks were making a sand mandala. They've been there for the past couple of weeks and the mandala now takes up nearly the whole shop floor. It's not a very big shop, but still, that's a lot of coloured sand. They normally have a couple of onlookers; it's a nice diversion for passersby. Today, though, there wasn't anyone watching as I went past, and I found out why when I turned the corner.

Set up in between the Wendy's and Muffin Break outlets was a small stage, from which a man in an Irwin-esque khaki shorts and shirt ensemble was telling a large group of children, parents and assorted stickybeaks like me about the taipan: 'There are two types of taipan. There's the inland taipan, that's the deadliest snake in the world. This here is the coastal taipan,'- he lifted a long brown snake from a box to delightedly horrified 'oohs' from the goggle-eyed kids in the front row - 'and it's only the second deadliest snake in the world.'

I left after that, passing a large glass box containing three scorpions. I thought, wouldn't it be fun to see them running around the supermarket? So I let them out. (I didn't really.)

Googling to find that picture of a taipan I linked to above, I discovered that the man was wrong on two counts: there are three types of taipan (the third species was discovered only recently) and the coastal taipan is only the third deadliest snake in the world (the eastern brown snake - guess what colour it is! - takes the silver medal). So, pah... not very scary at all.
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In high school, my friend Michelle loved 21 Jump Street. This earnt her quite a bit of mockery from those of us who preferred the clearly more cerebral offerings of Twin Peaks. In particular was our derision aimed at the giant poster of Richard Greico (all chipmunk cheeks, leather jacket and furrowed brow astride a motorcycle) that was blue-tacked to her cupboard door.

I hadn't thought of Richard Greico for years until this turned up on my RSS feed this morning. Ayyyy, indeed.

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